I love running. Not in the I-love-running-so-much-I-pee-my-pants-for-a-personal-best-type way. I love to run once a week. And I LOVE to race. I don't often win races (but I did win one), I actually aim for the middle. But I find the whole process very nice. And when I keep my running to once a week, I think I feel the full range of mental benefits that I believe come with running (it's as close as I get to meditation). Plus it totally made me Google-able. So, to kick my blog back into working order, here's a run down of the races I've done in the past couple of years, and the bits of wisdom I've gleaned from them (along with a little internal monologue, which probably borders on TMI). 
November 26, 2009:
My first race was a 5K Turkey Trot in Twin Falls, ID. I finished it in 31:51, which is alright, but winning in this race required getting as close to your estimated finish time as possible, and I missed that by 4:51. It was pretty chilly that morning (22 degrees F, maybe), and I had not collected my ninja running gear yet, so I was a pretty bulky runner, but it still felt pretty good. Also got the best sweatshirt ever, there aren't enough brown sweatshirts with turkeys on them.
Internal monologue:
Dang, it's cold.
Dang, it's cold.
Oh! Bright blue PBR cap! I'll follow that.
July 17, 2010: Several months later I ran another 5K in Cannonville, UT, and I won it! I finished in 26:34.6, which I didn't think was a winning time, but I didn't realize I was in the old lady division (25-29). I guess it's not that old, and women tend to peak in their running capability later than men, and I was 33rd overall... Anyways, what a pleasant surprise! It was also the first race I ran in my FiveFingers and that was a great success. Unfortunately, the only shoes I brought on that vacation were FiveFingers and Chacos, so I tried (and failed) to reach Mt. Hilliers in FiveFingers. Oh how my feet hurt. I also learned a bit about the importance of pre-race habits: Life cereal is no good. Sleeping in the back of your truck the night before is ok.
Internal monologue:
Wow! It gets hot early here! Why does the sun come up so early?
Why did I eat that cereal? It's only three miles, but I'm running it feels like I'm running with a rock in my stomach, and I think it's making my arms a little numb.
If only I'd peed before I started.
Oh my! That woman looks like she's in terrible pain, I'll never get a boob job.
November 13, 2010: Having clearly mastered the 3.1 mile (5K) length, I decided to run farther, so I opted to do the USU Turkey Trot 10K (which was not on Thanksgiving). I did not prep for this race, I ate poorly the night before and stayed up until 3:00 a.m., that was very humbling. My biggest race goal has always been to finish before someone else, and at this race I only finished before three people. Granted, there were about 30 people in the race, so there were fewer people to beat. But still, it was a struggle, I finished in 48:40. While that was around my goal time, I got roundly beat by the other college students. And that's when I decided I shouldn't run with such young people again. On a brighter note, I had the most delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich after that race.
Internal monologue:
This is the most convoluted race loop I've ever seen. I'm going to get this wrong.
Dang, I just flattened a course marker, why are they so small?
Dang, I just got passed again!
I wish I was wearing fewer layers, it started cold, but its hot.
Why did I wear so much clothing? It is ridiculous to run with my hat and gloves in hand.
It sure has been a while since I pooped, my tummy feels unpleasant.
April 26, 2010: After that humbling experience I decided to double my race distance again by running a half-marathon. This was a running goal for me (from way back in August, 2010), and a New Years Resolution, so it was pretty awesome to get it done so early in the year. However, I'm not sure I would have done it if Stephanie had not asked me to. What an awesome person she is! I finished this race in 2:04:05, a bit over my two hour goal time, but still satisfying. I kept up a 9:28 minute mile pace and began my new racing habit of finishing in the middle of my pack, placing 1818th of 4444 women in my age group. I also picked up another habit that has helped me race, I try to pass everyone in front of my wearing pink. It's pretty effective for me, but awkward now that I actually own a pink running tank. I also made a new pre-race habit: Race Muffins. My amazing mom made some carrot cake muffins the night before and I'm pretty sure they're were 7% of the reason I was able to finish (despite an intense tummy ache not related to the muffins). Note: it was super difficult to find a picture worth posting, I looked like zombie.
Internal monologue:
I haven't pooped in three days.
I haven't pooped in three days.
I haven't pooped in three days.
Oh! someone in pink- pass them!.
Oh! Finish line!
No, not finish line, another damn corner!
And another.
And another.
Oh, finish line! That's nice.
July 4, 2011: Around the 4th of July I decided I must be part of a Freedom Run. I had some intention to cross the finish line yelling "Freedom!" But there was no one there to see me finish, so I would have just creeped people out. I was pretty satisfied with this run, I got my pace mile under nine minutes (8:55.1 min), and finished in 1:22:56 (13th in my division of 48). It was on odd length, 15 k, but delightful. The course started half way up Blacksmith Fork Canyon, one of my favorite canyons ever, and finished in Hyrum. However, the organizers didn't provide a shuttle or port-a-potties on the course, and they weren't able to get the canyon closed, so I wasn't always able to run straight down the middle of the road, which is one of my favorite reasons to race. Anyways, it was a great race (despite the fact that I was roundly beaten by a woman pushing a stroller), and I was able to successfully hitch hike back to my truck (but what an awkward ride that was). I perfected my pre-race muffin routine here, making blueberry muffins the night before, unfortunately I dropped my cell phone in the sink cleaning the muffin dishes, and there was much mourning and confusion.
Internal monologue:
There's got to be an port-a-pottie on the course. There has to be.
What a pretty canyon this is.
Why aren't there more trees.
Why aren't there more trees.
I need to pee, I'll do it off the side of the road, but I'd like to hide my butt.
Oh, that hill looks well hidden from view.
August 12, 2011: After a vacation plan fell through I ended up being able to participate in my first trail race and first relay race all at the same time. It was the R-Scape trail relay and all the event signage said "Run Dirty" which I thought was fun, and the course was on the Mt. Ogden trail system, where I learned to hike. It was an 18-hour relay, with six mile legs and it may have been one of the hardest races I've participated in, but it was super cool. There was a 500 ft/~1mile hill climb in the first half that was soul-crushing, but it was followed by one of the funnest, sandiest downhill sections ever, much fun. I ran my first leg at 6:00 pm, and it was really dang hot, I preferred the other 2nd and 3rd laps that I ran at midnight and 6 am. Getting done with the hill climb and seeing the lights of the Ogden area and running in the moonlight was pretty dang cool. Turns out trail running is hard, too hard for the FiveFingers, I ended up busting them and one of my toes, but I learned two important lessons: 1) minimalist shoes are no good for trails, 2) check headlamp batteries before a night-time race. I've got no picture from this event, but I do have a picture of the only other time I tried trail running in my FiveFingers, oh what fun that was.
Internal monologue:
Oh these rocks hurt.
Look at all these high school runners passing me.
Man, this hill sucks, there's got to be a thousand vertical feet here.
Oh pretty, I've been hiking here.
Is that a rock or a shadow? Should I leap or not.
Rock.
September 17, 2011: After the Top of Utah half marathon filled up before I could sign up, I figured I may as well run the marathon. Perhaps not the best reason to sign up for a 26 mile race, but it worked out pretty well. Running to catch the shuttle bus to the start line at 5:30 am I learned that muffins are the perfect size for running and eating; and that you've got to start running pretty early to finish 26 miles at a decent hour. The first 13 miles were actually quite wonderful, it had rained all night and quite heavily for the first 10 miles, but that kept the temps very nice. My extra layers all got soggy, but there were boxes to drop off clothing throughout the race, and my shoes eventually dried (my toes never un-pruned though). Unfortunately, around mile 13 my knee started feeling tight, so I stopped and asked for some pain reliever from the first aid station, not knowing that none of the first aid stations were allowed to give out such medicine. It only took me two stations to figure that out, the second one offered to spray my leg with BioFreeze, but I was wearing tights and didn't think it was appropriate to pull down my pants along the race. The next nine miles were miserable because my IT band was causing me pain (according to Runner's World's diagnosis); this made it pretty painful to run, but actually worse to walk. To keep going I developed a walk/run strategy: run 1-2 miles, walk for 300 paces. And that got me to the finish line in 4:30:23, 23 seconds off of my 4:30 goal (and exactly in the middle of my division, 55th of 109 finishers)! 10:19 minute miles aren't bad, and they were much faster during the first half (also made my secondary goal to not get injured, take that you nay-sayers!).
I heard and saw a lot of encouraging things along the way, including signs that said "Your feet hurt because you're kicking so much ass!", "You don't need your toenails" and "You can do hard things!" There was also a woman who told me I had pretty hair while I was feeling my most miserable, and a guy who said there were ice cream sandwiches at the finish line (that last on almost gave me a second wind). Finishing was great, Brent was there to see it and there were ice cream sandwiches and a couple friends who had finished before. All in all a good event, then I waddled home and could barely move the rest of the weekend. Everything is pretty good now, I know I can finish a marathon and the only lasting impact is my black toenail, I think eventually it will fall off.
Internal monologue:
This canyon is gorgeous.
Cool it mama, you can go slower.
Nice, there are bathrooms every miles.
Ooh, GU is nice.
That man has to be at least 70, that's awesome!
Oh gosh, my knee feels awful.
Oh, paramedics, must get medicine.
Geez, that ibuprofen would have been easier to swallow with water.
Nibley sucks, cars to the left, cows to the right.
Almost there, no, going around more corners.
Ice cream sandwiches? That sounds amazing!
I've been trying to figure out if there are any lessons I've learned from this whole running experience, and here's my first crack at it (Warning: I just watched the latest Warren Miller movie, its the most recent "wisdom" I'm drawing on):
1) Race muffins make all the difference, I recommend carrot cake or blueberry.
2) Don't run and drink at the same time, but take a drink often. It could shave a few seconds of your time (well, my time), but I inevitably cough and look foolish. Plus I usually splash it on myself, making it appear as though I've got a severe drooling problem.
3) Keep your digestive system in good working order before the race, calculating the last time you pooped is not a fun race distraction.
4) Give props, they totally help. And the good ju-ju might help your finish time.
5) Smile at anyone with a camera, zombie runner pics are lame.
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